I have just finished one of my tutorials on writing and finding my scholarly voice. The tutorial that I found most compelling tonight is developing an addiction to writing. This tutorial was really quite wonderful and helped me to see where I have built some barriers to writing. In order to comply with the tutorial, I am suppose to identify some of my barriers to writing and then develop a plan to overcome these barriers in my quest to write more.
First, I must say that I love to write. Writing to me is very therapeutic. It helps me to process my thoughts for the hour, the day, or for whatever time frame I may need to process. It also allows me to listen to my own voice. I will admit readily that I don't often listen to my own voice and perhaps this is the reason I don't write as often. Well, before I say that, let me explore the barriers to why I have not written for a while. First, I have been totally demoralized by my doctoral program. While I do criticism very well, I guess I am try to find my way in this new world of writing. As a doctoral student, writing at this level is very different than how I wrote for my masters program. I think the main issue is with the scholarship. Each paragraph I write, it feels like I need to qualify everything I say with a reference. I do have an opinion and sometimes I state this opinion in my writing. I need to develop a better balance. So this is another barrier that stops me from writing. I get so caught up in the research and reading, I have little time left to write. Instead, I am rushing to write and I resent that because it takes the joy right out of it for me! Not having enough time to write is really an excuse for me sometimes. Yes, I am very busy with work and with school, but at the end of the day, I enjoy writing. Yet, I find excuses why something else should be a priority over my writing. Perhaps my rebuke is the result of my dwindling confidence because of being a doctoral student. Maybe I do not handle criticism as well I I thought I did. Time to explore that for sure.
Ok - time for my plan. First, I promise I will write at least 3-4 times per week. I can either write here in my blog (which I really enjoy doing for my entire 3 or 5 readers - I am thankful for you though), or I can write for assignments, or I can simply write for the sake of writing. I generally do that form of writing in my blog here. Whatever the case, I promise myself I will write at least 4 times a week. My reward for writing will be the writing itself and the accomplishment of knowing that perhaps I am regaining my writing confidence again. Yup - that sounds good. Oh and I can watch my favorite show on TV ... wait, I am going to do that anyway. Well ... the next time I write I will better describe my reward for writing.
Thanks for coming back to my blog. I hope you enjoy my new commitment to writing.